I am DaVinci

I actually am not DaVinci.  That is a quote from one of our professors who also happens to be a retired general surgeon.  He said that after being asked about the DaVinci surgery option for gallbladder removal.  In case you don't know, DaVinci is a robotic surgical platform which can perform basic surgeries with minimal incisions and recovery time.  The surgeon is in control of the program, but they don't actually manually manipute the instruments inside your body.  So what I am wondering is if it is selfish that I wish we just did surgery the old fashioned way and were satisfied with it because I think that it is more fun to get your hands dirty than sit behind a computer.  I know what you're thinking, I love videogames so why not love computerized surgery.  Well, there is no Mario to put it shortly.  In fact I doubt it would have any sort of cartoonish characteristics to it at all.  I suppose if they altered the program so what I saw on the screen was more like Mario I would be slightly more excited, but I have a Wii for that at home.  Anyway, I think taking some of the personal interaction out of medicine may be a little bad.  Okay fine.  I just want to actually be a real part of the surgery process.  I mean, I am here learning more than I want to so I can someday (3rd year) experience the type of surgery where you actually get your hands into a body cavity.  Okay that sounded wrong.  I can't think of a way to phrase it better so feel free laugh at will.  I just think that there is something which connects doctors, especially surgeons, back to the root of patient care in physical contact.  Just having a nurse take your blood pressure by a machine feels less personal even if she is talking to you the whole time.  From the other side, if I never had physical contact with people and instead had robots do all the work and I saw the results on a screen they would be less people-ish to me.  But I have to acknowledge that if it really does have less complications and a better prognosis I should choose to use it in my patient's best interest.  But really I wonder where the point is that impersonal, but more effective medicine becomes a detriment to patient care.  Maybe never.  It's something to ponder.  But I want to get my hands dirty instead of letting a robot do it.  So I say I agree with Dr. Lee.  He is DaVinci and you can be too with many years of schooling and an arrest of the progress of putting computer programs into medicine.

So today we were supposed to skin the man bits in lab.  We didn't end up getting that far so the other group will have to do it tomorrow morning. Yay!  Disclaimer: The information you are about to read is the kind that grosses you out and may make you gag, yet oddly compels you to share with everyone you can find later.  We did not get to the man bits because we first had to dissect out the gluteal region, inferior rectum, and anus.  In order to get deep enough in the gluteal region to get to the anus we had to remove a lot of fat.  Our cadaver is skinny and we removed fat for over 2 hours in a really tiny space.  The reason it took so long is because the fat around your anus is much more liquid than anywhere else in your body.  I have no idea why so don't ask.  Anyway, we kept getting to a point where we couldn't see the bottom of the cave we were making in his buttocks because it would fill up with fat juice (for lack of a better term).  The juice looked exactly like the butter dipping sauce for lobster and crab meat.  It was a nice shade of yellow and had a sort of whitish bit of creamy stuff on the top.  So it took us a really long time to get to the sphincter we were trying to find and to dissect out the arteries, nerves, and veins as well and we never got to the man bits.  So now I do not have to do the dreaded man bit skinning lab and only have to find structures on the skin-free product.

Once I got out of lab I cleansed myself of the smell of death and went back to PBL.  We were finishing up a case of lesbian appendicitis.  Being a lesbian has a lot to do with it because it makes it easy to rule out pregnancy as a cause for abdominal pain and vomiting.  I presented my HIPAA findings very succinctly and everyone commented on how HIPAA is not cool.  Our group leader pointed out that perhaps it was made with so many exceptions and loop holes so health care providers could decide case by case what is in the patient's best interest.  I thought that would be the most genious idea ever for a policy and then had to dismiss that theory because I remember who made it.  If I ever run a country I am going to make policies full of holes so people can get away with things and not be held responsible, but they also can be held responsible because everything is so convoluted yet amazing.  It's hard to explain, but I know it could work if someone besides politicians got the end say in it.  Go think about it for yourself and get back to me.

So I studied today!  That was quite the accomplishment because I hate studying.  I can now draw out the arteries and anastomosis of the thorax, abdomen, and pelvis.  I can also explain the embryological formation of the kidneys, testis, ovaries, uterus, digestive system, pancreas, and part of the liver.  I think that is a lot.  Except I need to learn the venous drainage, nerves, and the rest of the embryology by Monday as well as be able to identify the structures in lab and know the anatomical relationships of all the structures.  And after everything I put that I learned you thought I was doing well and perhaps was close to finishing.  Ah, to be naive again.  I have decided I don't like information and knowing stuff.  It's not all that cool.  I think everyone should stay in a bubble where all they have to do is watch Phineas and Ferb all day.  Sorry Spongebob, but they are just so clever and I have seen all you have to offer and they are still new to me.  Maybe someday you can be my point of reference for ultimate fun things again.  I did watch Phineas and Ferb today.  It was nice.  I keep remembering what a wise comedian disguised as a doctor once told me.  He said, "Live in the moment.  If you are studying, then study.  If you are on break then there is no such thing as medical school and you enjoy yourself.  But never get stuck doing one thing and thinking about another.  That is not the way to be successful and be a great doctor.  You can't be thinking about your laundry while you are treating a patient and still give them quality care.  You need to learn that now so you can be happier and better physicians in the future."  Really I think that is the best advice I got during orientation week.  Maybe the best advice I have gotten ever.  I appreciate and accomplish a lot more each moment now than before for sure.  That is from one of our faculty.  He isn't a comedian, but he is so funny I pretend he is a professional comedian and just went to medical school because he is that awesome.  And you thought I was about to quote Patch Adams.